Star Trek: Discovery - Season 4 (With Spoilers)

[Mabus]

Wow, no thread on the latest season of STD? But you guys are missing the greatest (unintentional) comedy since Troll 2, Taken 3, After Earth and G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra! The first three episodes so far gave us amazing comedic moments:

Episode 1:
-Alex Kurtzman rips off the teaser from the only JJ NuTrek film he wasn't involved in. It's hilarious to see him try to fail at comedy, given that the scene from Beyond with Kirk was just a simple cheeky joke poking fun at the TOS first contact shenanigans. Instead, the entire opening scene is a joke. But wait, it gets better. Michelle Paradise and Jenny Lumet also co-wrote the episode, meaning that three people couldn't properly rip-off a single scene and make it at the very least equally as funny! How many people does it take to rip-off a movie scene? Certainly not three.
-Butterfly people... as in people... with butterflies... that form butterfly wings... and somehow they fly... they fly now... they... fly now...
-But wait, the same butterfly people that want to shoot Michael and Book, decide to give them a head start, fly a bit in air, all while pointing their guns at he duo, and only then fire at them, while completely missing every single shot. But wait, it gets even better. Apparently they can't aim properly because of magnets or something, how convenient. I guess when you're on a world of floating rocks, there might be some magnetic technobabble interferences of some kind, who knew. Speaking of...
-"Why is there always a cliff" pfffffffff, it's cute to see the Dis writes trying to be self-aware, when your entire opening scene is full of tired clichés that James Bond writers would find ridiculous, but most importantly... you're on a floating rock! Did you forgot you're a floating rock? Also, did you forget that massive cliff between you and the butterfly people like 20 seconds earlier? You're surrounded by cliffs! Self-aware jokes don't work when the whole scene doesn't work! But it's amusing to see the writers patting themselves on the back thinking they're smart by having the characters making MCU-like quips.
-"We will free the queen" Bwhahaha, which one of the three stooges wrote that line? Did they actually thought it would be funny? 20 seconds ago the Butterfly Engineers were angry that the duo brought a predator animal, and now they want to free said predator animal? Hey morons, here's a tip: don't confuse the audience when trying to make a joke. Speaking of morons...
-"She's a queen" I'll admit I have no idea when this dumb phrase came about, but do the writers seriously think that 21st century slang will still exist 1000 years into the future? A human slang used by a non-human mind you, who somehow adopted a Terran animal? And why is the cat brought to the planet, was Book afraid that someone on Discovery would have eaten it?
-The butterly engineers need the planet's magnetic field to navigate, are technologically advanced enough to build a huge network of satellites in orbit to compensate for any magnetic shift, somehow, yet they didn't consider the fact that the planet's magnetic poles have shifted 300 years earlier (something which we currently can detect), which BTW, would put it before The Burn, and instead they just sit around doing nothing... because the satellites need dilithium to work... what? xD?Shouldn't then the satellites have gone boom-boom during The Burn? Don't they have alternative power sources that they could have used after the satellites went dark from the Burn? They had like 100 years to fix their damn satellites. And they need the crew of- sorry, they need Burnham to solve that problem, all during a firefight? OK, Adira contributed about 2% to the solution, because one of the previous hosts loved birds... probably as Chicken McNuggets, cause those must still exist 1000 years into the future. And some of the bridge crew talked a bit I guess. Oh and once the problem is solved, all conflict ends. Lmao, good one.
-Wait, why are the three Ba'ul outside the Gungan city? Was the CGI too expensive to get them indoors? in some fish tanks of sorts? How can anyone hear them from outside, they can speak underwater now?
-"Archer space dock" where new ships will be built and used for exploration. Probably in the next season, since we currently don't enough budget, we couldn't even get a bunch of cheap shadow CGI effects inside a dark room in the previous scene. But hey at least we have Captain Archer's theme playing, you know, the guy from the worst series that you fondly want to be remembered of?
-Right after the reveal of the Archer Space Dock, the next scene shows a black skinned Tellarite, and the very next scene shows lt. Owosekun, and I don't know if its the lighting, but both their characters skin tones match and both even have dreadlocks! WTF, are you people trying to be racist? Even if the makeup team didn't intend for the Tellarite mask to have the same skin tone as the other actress, couldn't you at least NOT SHOW THE TWO SCENES ONE AFTER THE OTHER? Like, show each character from different angles? Or why even show the Tellarite at all? There were other aliens in the group? They aren't shown in close-ups. The black skinned Tellarite is the only alien shown in the close-up and it just so happens that the very next character that appears onscreen is also the only black actress from the bridge? Why couldn't they show for example Detmer after the Tellarite, or Vance since he was also in the scene? Why was that order necessary, so people make racist jokes? And even if the extra portraying the Tellarite is black, and the make-up dept. decided to simply use a make-up that matches their skin tone so this was inevitable (and cheaper, let's face it the whole show runs cheap), YOU STILL DON'T NEED TO SHOW THE TWO SCENES IN A ROW! Does nobody even check how scenes are edited? If I hadn't known better I'd say that someone on the show decided to be a dickhead with the editing, but at this point I'm starting to wonder if that's actually what happened, because wow.
-Quick, we need a character we can hate because it dares to question the competence of our pet, who shall it be? Well let's see, how about the President? Excellent! Now have the President join the Discovery bridge during a dangerous mission, with no one escorting her, because we don't have the money for extras.
-Oh look the station is spinning in all directions, a good metaphor for the series' writing.
-Oh right, there are people living on Book's planet, quick, form an emotional bond to them, that way you'll feel bad when they all die offscreen. We'll make it easier for you, there's a kid in the scene.
-"Magnify that" the entire transmission is scrambled, how would Burnham even know th-oh right, because Burnham, and clearly that's gravity distorsion and no way it could have been anything else, like say, a transmission error, or maybe a cloaking device like in STIII. Also, Burnham solves the mystery of what hit the station in just a few seconds. Bwhahahaha
-"One of my engineers called it a shitshow" see Kurtzman, this is self-aware writing. Take notes. xD
-Our gravity is everywhere, look how we can rotate the camera... weeeeeeeee
-"If we could match speed and rotation" Dis writers kind of forgot about tractor beams. And it's not the only thing they forgot about...
-Yup, NuTrek writers have completely forgot about deflector shields... you know, that dish in front of ships that push space debris away from the ship? I guess next they'll remove deep space sensors, that way we'll have more drama when the space debris are right in our face... oh wait, that's exactly what happened. And why couldn't they detect it from hundreds of km away, they're in the 32nd century, today we have sensors that can detect space ice from thousands of km away.
-FLAMETHROWERS! WE HAVE FLAMETHROWERS ON THE BRIDGE! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! What is this, Forged in Fire? Looks how cartoonish they are: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JOPhZ0Pzsqs Also, holy shit, there's a literal flame SFX near Stamets, when Burnham tells him to give all the power available to the shields, even though there is no panel exploding near him. Holy shit, what am I watching bwhahahahahaha!
-"blew out the Heisenberg compensator" yeah, not even that can compensate for the amount of stupid this show displays. Wait. Don't they have personal teleporters? WTF? Did the writers forgot about that too? And why doesn't Discovery have shuttles? Why doesn't the station itself have runabouts or similar ships? Just a single one-use ship? And no EVA suits? What is this, Alien: Isolation? Wait, at least they had EVA suits in Alien: Isolation.
-"Are you sure you should be leaving the bridge during a red alert?" "Well yeah bitch, I have plot armor, what do you have, a cheap suit and make-up?"
-MORE FLAMETHROWERS! MORE FLAMES!
-Shame of you random piece of methane ice! How could you? Now Burnham will have to escape unharmed despite being struck by basically thousands of glass/transparent aluminium/metal pieces/methane ice pebbles and hold her breath in the vacuum of space, even though she should have been shredded by the debris. Oh and this will reveal the convenient Iron Man nanotech EVA suit, which for some reason no one else has, even though it would have come in handy.
-MORE FLAMETHROWERS! EVEN IN STAMETS' ROOM!
-Burnham opens a private line to the president... which everyone else on the bridge could hear.
-"When the shields are down, we could be destroyed"... you have weapons? Use them to clear out the debris?
-EVEN MORE FLAMETHROWERS!
-"So threfore you're immune to failure?" DO NOT QUESTION THE BURNHAM OR YOU'LL BE PUNISHED! Also, FLAMETHROWERS! (during a tense moment)
-The birds! The sky is full of dead birds! Which are all in the same place somehow. And something that appears to be rocks! And then the moon explodes because it hot hit by a cheap Vegas Pro special effect. Which no one could have detected because gravity moves in mysterious ways I guess. Wait, didn't Burnham sent a message to Kwejian to look out for gravitation anomalies like an hour ago? Ah well, I guess the writers forgot they're writing for Star Trek.
-UPSIDE DOWN FLAMETHROWERS! ELON MUSK SENDS HIS REGARDS!
-That piece of the space station is the shark from Jaws IV, it's chasing the escape ship! NOOOOOOO!
-Oh no the guy who wanted to go home died... who could have seen that coming... he was only three days from retirement... or was it because he cut off Adira and Tillie when they were talking?
-"There is a very fine line between a pendulum and a wrecking ball", right, just like there's a fine line between a toilet and a bathtub, a chainsaw and a bike chain, a Hollywood writer and a graffiti vandal, a banana and a dildo, a banknote and a bank note. 100% correct.
-Oh the horror! Booker's planet was turned into low-quality blurred CGI! That's a fate no one should have to experience!
-Also, if Kwejian is gone, then so are trance worms. You remember them? Those big slugs from the previous season, the ones Booker spent most of his life trying to save them? No? Well, me neither.

I used to think that Star Trek: Discovery was a tragedy, but now I realize, it's actually a comedy.

[Mabus]

Episode 2:
-"I need you to go" Book finally says what most people think of Michale Burnham.
-"5 light years across, that's the size of the gravitational anomaly that hit Kweijan and the space station" right now, with out primitive telescopes and spectroscopes we can detect gravitational lensing from galaxies millions of LY away, and yet the 32nd century Federation can't see it? In the TNG era and earlier they could detect gravitational anomalies of all sorts, even microscopic ones, yet now, all of the sudden they can't detect something that's the size of a space nebula? Holy shit, at this rate, the writers will soon have the Federation ships navigating by having the Captain going outside, without EVA suit and holding his breath, to look around with a telescope, like they used to do during the sailing era. And this will be another source of tension, because how else are they going to create tension.
-Also, you're telling me a gravitational anomaly that gigantic hit a planet and it merely cracked apart? Scale-wise, that's the equivalent of dropping a giant boulder on a sandy beach, and somehow only a grain of sand nearby is slightly affected. Sci-fi writers really don't have a sense of scale. They just like to throw big numbers, then weasel their way out of the mess they created. Excellent. Bring me more of this wonderful comedy.
-"A roving binary black hole" and "we believe that two black holes are merging" yeah, no, largest black hole we know of, TON 618, is merely 0.04 LY in diameter, and we know this because it's a quasar, meaning it emits lots of energy. A lot. And I mention this because...
-"Unless matter is actively falling into a black hole, they're largely undetectable", not only they can detect black holes and singularities in Star Trek casually, they would have been able to see the light distortion from afar, because you know, Burnham saw it in the previous episode. You'd think they'd be able to use their eyes to see for such anomalies, but nope. Also also, if said gravitational anomaly generates gravitational waves, those can be detected, since in this century we already have, from merging of much smaller black holes. And said gravitational anomaly is ripping apart every solar system it encounters, meaning at the very least they should be able to see that.
-Book just randomly walks in the meeting. WTF, is this a public event? Is it open for the public? Are you kidding me?
-"An anomaly like this could fling debris far beyond five light years" What, the laws of physics changed? How does that even work?
-Random Ni'var decides to give a helping hand... I wonder why would they do that...
-Tillie thinks about that guy that died in the last episode... because he was such a memorable character... no one ever died 3 days away from retirement, wanting to go back home. "Hell, life is just a blink, huh? It's... it is one heartbeat in the entire lifespan of the universe. Just don't really think I understood that before" wat? You're telling me that after experiencing the Klingon war, the Mirror Universe, the Control incident, learning that in an alternate timeline all life in the Galaxy was wiped out, nearly dying from shitty cowboy pirates, twice, the time travel thing 1000 years into the future where you saw a very different Earth, where everything changed, and thus all of your old friends and relatives are long dead, except for that tree which is now fully mature, seeing the guy played by your real-life husband being vaporized in your face, facing Osyraa and having a gun pointed at your head, nearly dying again before Booker saved you, after experiencing all that, it still took you to see some random dude you never met before to die and a planet you've never set foot on to be destroyed, for you to realize that life is fragile? REALLY? BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
-"Commander Bryce" wait, that guy has a name? Damn, maybe at this rate we'll learn the names for half of the main crew without having to look up on IMDB or Memory-Alpha.
-"Today we seek to understand a threat like none our galaxy has faced before." What? WHAT? "We lost colleagues, friends... and Kweijan." And who are those colleagues and friends you lost? That guy from the previous episode and two unnamed characters? Really? Also, Tillie all of the sudden tears up. WTF, really? "Countless lives... histories, futures." WHO? WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE THAT DIED? Because we're never told how many people lived on Kweijan, and there were only two more characters that we saw on the planet. It's incredible, the show wants you to feel sorry for a planet that only appeared like twice before, and even then it was mostly about Michael and Detmer. Why should I care that Kweijan died, because some random kid died? We're not even told how many Kweijan lived on the planet. For all we know, half of the population left after most of the planet starved from The Burn. "We won't let their deaths be in vain" WHOSE DEATHS? "Not on our watch" Welp, shit, now Burnham will save the day. Again.
-"Commander Owosekun, apply a polarizing spectrographic filter" Oh my God, it's blue pixels! The greatest menace in existence! Oh no, there's even dramatic music! We all need to appear serious while staring at I have no what. WE'RE FUCKED!
-Quick, after the credits, we need to spin the camera around, because tension!
-"Scanners can't penetrate the outer edge of the accretion cloud" well that explains how the ship's sensors couldn't see the debris field from the previous episode. Federation sensors literally can't see the forest for the trees!
-The Discovery can't get pass the debris cloud. Man, if only they had something that could deflect the debris, like a device that can create a deflection field of sorts, maybe attach it to a ship, and call it deflector. Damn, that would have been a good idea.
-"The science holds" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MxaFnx8GGX8
-So Booker is not under Burnham's command, OK, makes sense, meaning he doesn't have to listen to her, OK, but then how can he keep his ship inside Discovery? Is he like a special consultant, a mercenary, private contractor? How is Admiral Vance OK with this? The president? The other Starfleet brass? Do they even clarify Booker's status in the Federation? Eh, I guess he's just there as the plot demands.
-So Gray wants a new body, makes perfect sense, and apparently this is still a big issue in the future, why? Oh but Picard was one of the few people that pulled a successful mind transfer, like 800 years ago... and during all that time no one was able to improve the technology... because the success rate was so low, people just stopped trying... right.. I'll believe that...not! You're telling me people gave up on trying to achieve immortality? No wait, just like Picard's clone body, this one will age normally. So no mortality. Really? REALLY? But it's OK, because Gray already survived one mind transfer, so it should work. Because logic. Also, shame on you Dis for reminding me of that shitty ending of S1 of Discard.
-"Can we get rid of the mole?" What, you don't have cryotherapy in the 32nd century? And have dermal regenerators been banned in the future and I don't know? Cause one is shown being used in this very episode.
-Oh, we'll tie a string to Book's ship, that way we won't lose him... is he planning on travelling like 100 km ahead, because I don't think Discovery has enough "programmable matter" to make a "string" millions of km long. Do the writers even understand how space works?
-"Well it did just pass through a planetary system" Really! I know they were trying to make an intentionally bad joke at the expense of Book's planet, but they mentioned in the beginning of the episode that the anomaly was about to enter another star system which they were about to evacuate, so why are they so certain that this is debris from Book's planet? THE THING IS 5 LY ACROSS! From all the know this debris is centuries old! Do these people even understand scale?
-"Can your shields handle this?" Doesn't your ship have weapons that you could use to break apart the big chunks? Why not use them? And again, no fucking deflector.
-BIRDS! Thank fuck they weren't actual birds, that would have been just stupid. Though it would have been hilarious.
-A gravity do-hicky somehow hits Discovery and everyone floats! OMG, that is this, it's hilarious. But wait it gets even better. Because after they all fall down, THE FLAMETHROWERS RETURN, BABY! YES! YES! Also, the very fist scene after the "crash" shows a close-up of the FLAME, before the camera shifts towards the main cast! I CAN'T EVEN! WHAT AM I WATCHING!? Is the Discovery flamethrower the new main character? It sure is more entertaining than the show, I will give you that. Yes baby, spin that camera, we need to show all the flamethrowers that we installed in the bridge set. Thank you Elon Musk!
-NO TILLIE, DON'T! One does not simply annoy Adira with facts, logic and attitude! Don't you remember what happened the last guy that tried that? You know, the guy you're mourning?
-Captain, I know when the gravity thingy will hit us, just wait 4 seconds for me to run up to you instead of using the comm, to tell you it will hit us in 2 seconds, that way you'll have no time to hold onto something.
-The fire rises, and so do the stuntsmen!
-EVEN MORE FLAMETHROWERS!
-Wow, even Booker's ship has flamethrowers!
-"You do realize you've spoken to me more today than you have in the past, what, five months?" Yeah, that sounds like most of the main characters on Discovery.
-"Riding gravitational waves is the same as riding water waves" Well hello there, what was your name again? Brian? Bryce! You just show up in the scene, just like that. And solve the problem. Now back off, you're making Burnham sound incompetent, now we have to force her to save the day, because Booker is too much of a dumbass.
-BWHAHAHAHA, Booker questioned the great Michael Burnham and he failed his task. WTF, really. But don't worry, she's awesome and will give you one more shot, provided you listen to her fully. Cause you see, the captain can now do Detmer's job even better than her.
-WHAT! THE! FUCK! Why does the captain have a personal shield bubble? First off, why doesn't anyone have one, given that it would have been damn useful like 10 minutes ago? Second... why does it even exist in the first place? Why can't Burnham just go to her private quarters and talk from here? Do they even realize how awful and ridiculous it appears to have the captain be in the middle of its crew and talk privately for whatever reason?
-"In less than two minutes" Yo, it's been nearly 3 minutes and the gravity thingy still isn't here.
-And of course, the great and mighty Michael Burnham saves the day, yet again!
-Tillie tries to talk about talking about something? What...
-Oh yeah, Adira and Grey, they're still around, I guess.
-"Brilliant flying" Were you talking to Booker or to yourself?
-"You were right" Oh come one, does every single character in this show has to tell Michael that she's right about everything? I can only laugh so much.
-"This is the anomaly when we arrived" flips the image "and this is it after we left" Oh my God, it's exactly the same! No wait, it pulled a 180. It's moving backwards, like the franchise.
-Oh my God, the anomaly is the CBS logo! It makes perfect sense! Ever since 2017, CBS has been moving around the Star Trek universe and destroys everything it touches, making people sad and angry! And no one can predict its direction and path! HOLY SHIT! Now everything makes sense.

[Mabus]

Episode 3:
-Ah yes, no one's favorite Space Ninjas, how convenient for Starfleet officers to not have ancient defenses, such as phasers in their holsters, or maybe activate an entrapment shield, like Picard did back in the 24th century, in the episode where he was kidnapped by that telepathic alien duo. Nope, everyone knows that hand to hand combat is the only way, and and phasers are just for dummies. Actually, forget holsters, IIRC, everyone in the Starfleet can simply make their phaser appear out of their sleeve, right? So why don't Starfleet officers do that here? Oh yeah, because otherwise the scene would play out like in Indiana Jones. Hey, why aren't Starfleet security beaming inside the room? Better yet, why aren't there any defenses of sorts against unauthorized intruders?
-"Fourth and most recent in a string of identical dilithium thefts" FOURTH? WHAT! You mean you know someone out there is stealing your dilithium and you've done nothing to increase security? BWHAHAHAHAHA! Seriously?
-"Thanks to the tracker we installed" Wait, hold on a second. You installed a tracker in that dilithium shipment and you didn't tell the commander of the Credence about it? Did he try to stop the intruders not knowing the shipment was bugged? Or did he know? In that case, does that mean he died like a complete dumbass? WTF! BWHAHAHAHA! How are you people so stupid? What is even going on?
-Oh looks, Burham's mom is here, because I guess everyone likes her, since she's known for... something.
-This is an internal matter for us, so we're here to ask you to give us her location, now let's change subject, sort of.
-"The unique ways of the Qowat Milat must be respected" Why? What are they gonna do, bore you to death? They use fucking swords when everyone around them uses personal shields, personal transporters, instant sleeve gun. In fact, why is everyone from the Federation president to Vance accept to be pussy-whipped around? Oh yes, because the Federation needs the Vulcans and the Romulans in their pants. But... the Federation controls the dilithium supply, so why are they so afraid to scare the Romuvulcans? "We cannot restore the Federation without Ni'Var" Really? That's a weak reasoning. I mean, the Vulcans were more important at the beginning of the Federation, after that they kind of fade into obscurity, if anything, the Klingons are more important... but I guess that's one minefield Kluzman doesn't want to step it.
-Tillie is just there to exist
-Hey Book, since you only exist in the story as a plot device, may I use your plot device ship? Yeah, sure just make sure you don't forget to remove the cat, unlike last time.
-"Dark Matter Anomaly", yeah everything is dark in this show, and the show itself is an anomaly.
-"I want to go to the Science Institute with you" Why? Why not be a part of Burnham's team? It's your ship, and this plot is already stretching just way too much. Now Book will literally turn into a book.
-Ah yes, the Trill are still a thing, and clearly they need lots of the stuff for body uploading... you know what, this plotline is literally like Grey's wart, it should be removed as soon as possible.
-"Absolute Candor" More like Absolute Bullshit
-"You need to leave your phasers on board" "You will use swords instead... even though none of you ever spent an entire lifetime learning swordfighting" Excuse me while I explode from laughing. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK! Is this the only way your Ninja Bene Gesserit ripoffs can be considered the most fearsome warriors in the Galaxy? Because they kill unarmed people? What the fuck am I seeing? These people are the most badass warriors.. because they can defeat anyone who can't defeat them...? What is this bullshit? Who thought of this? Do these morons even understand the material they're ripping off? I mean, in Dune, they use knives and swords (and smart projectiles) because energy shields have changed the way wars are fought. But in NuTrek, the superninjas don't wear any personal shields or energy absorbing materials, so they're literally fighting against ranged projectiles without any protection, other than plot armor. And given that shields in Star Trek don't work like in Dune, swordfights shouldn't even be a thing. Oh wait, Kurtzman couldn't even properly rip off a film in the film series he and JJ developed. Why do I even bother.
-"We'll be at a huge disadvantage" "It was agreed that the ways of the "Qowat Milat would be respected" Yup, as I suspected. The only way the Boring Ninjas can actually win is if the enemy is weaker than them. Awesome warriors. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to beat up some people in the coma, I have to maintain my image of undefeated warrior in any way possible.
-"Warning, intruder alert" Really? Not even Book's ship doesn't have some automated force field projectors? Or does the ship also follow the Qowat Milat ways?
-AHAHAHAHAHAHA, during the fight one of the mercenaries kicks Tillie so hard she loses 20 kg. What's funny is that in the scene prior he kicked her downwards, but in the next she just flies away. Even Burnham is like "whoa, dude": https://i.imgur.com/GFB64J7.png
-Oh no, the other Cloaked Ninja was killed... what was her name again?
-"I'm here to tell you and if you come after me I'll kill you... which is something you needed to know, because it wasn't obvious" OK lady who just lost her entire warrior gang and is now 1 vs 3.
-Oh no, will Gray make it yes he will. Moving on.
-"The degree of desiccation suggests these pods are several centuries old" How would you even know it would take centuries for the unknown material you've never encountered before and doesn't exist in your database to dry out in a cavern on an unknown world with unknown atmosphere and environment? Ahahahahaha, come on.
-"Grave robbers?" How would you even know, for all they know the pod malfunctioned and exploded. Why are you so certain?
-"I would totally hug my hateful mom if she was here" says Tillie for some reason.
-"This isn't a moon. It's a ship" Hey don't rush to conclusions, maybe Tillie's mom is there after all!
-"There should be a way up there" You could use your personal transporters...? Nah, fuck it, we'll just use this convenient elevator, which should totally work after centuries. Wait, how does Burnham know a)that it's a turbolift and b)how to operate it?
-Ah yes, the Vulcan Science Institute is just a bunch of hexagons floating up in the sky... I guess there are no high altitude winds on Vulcan.
-Why is there a giant rock in the middle of the council meeting? Do they not realize that it obscures the view? None of the scientists at the meeting can see the guys from the other side. Is this a joke? What am I even watching? https://i.imgur.com/UFuCfAb.png
-So the Vulcan scientists just go into meditation to focus better on problems? I guess eye-rolling would have been too similar to Dune, and we already have Bene Gesserit and Butlerian Jihad ripoffs. Too many similarities and we'll get sued by the Herbert estate.
-"This shows a supernova" well, how convenient for the aliens to have made a drawing, in the event some outsider came and wondered what's the deal with the moon-sized ship.
-"And that's no mausoleum out there" That one looks like an Alien egg chamber. And that one looks like a Cease & Desist.
-"I need you to stay here, as bait" Burnham said calmly. No really, there was a loud echo when Burnham said "echo". Ahahahahaha, did they actually filmed that scene in a cave?
-Oh so now they can just beam in at any moment? Ahahahaha, why couldn't you do that before?
-"No Michael, I've got this", *Morgan Freeman voice* except she didn't.
-Ah so the grave robbers want to kill the aliens to extract the latinum from their blood? What? How does that even work? Better yet, how did they even found that there's latinum on this dead rock?
-"Starfleet doesn't dispense dilithium to individuals" What, you mean you couldn't have awaken a few of those aliens and ask them to contact the Federation for help? Or hell, since it's apparently not possible to awaken them, even though one of them was able to be awoken somehow, just tell the Federation about them? The Federation doesn't care very much about latinum, not that you had to tell them about that. If anything they would have wanted to help a civilization like them, since with a moon ship, the Federation could borrow it if possible and evacuate planets in the way of the anomaly much faster. Hell, if they could even make another moon ship, they could use that to mine the dilithium from that planet much better. It's not the first time the Federation had to deal with sleeper ancient civilizations, if anything they have better experience than Dollar Store Costume Space Ninjas.
-So... not only did Burnham knew how to operate the unknown turbolift, now she also determined that the reason the rest of the aliens didn't awake is because the stasis tech is broken? Really? She now literally knows everything about a civilization no one has ever heard of before? What's next, she solves the problem in a few minutes?
-"A mind meld is what I need to reduce our budget on SFX"
-Burnham solves the problem after a few minutes... yup, she now can literally do everything, next up, she solves the mystery of the anomaly, because in this episode Stamets failed, meaning Burnham has to do it herself. This is pure comedy material right here.
-So the aliens have just awoken and are moving to colonize the planet. And they don't bother to contact the team? I guess , CGI was too expensive.
-"It's part of a longer saying", yeah it's an abbreviation of an even bigger bullshit phrase.
-To quite Bill Burr, Admiral Vance redefines "pussy-whipped". Even before the episode, he didn't feel like a Starfleet officer, more like that uncle that comes at your family reunion because his wife forced him to. Bu now he just sits there, there is literally no conflict between him and the president, which I assume is because that would mean his character would actually do something else besides just being there nodding in approval.
-"Think of us like an orchestra" and you're the drummer boy, doing everything you're asked without questioning and hesitation. "She's the conductor, when she signals us, we play". Repeat after me: Pussy-whipped. That's what you are.
-"Well, they pay me by the letter" I think that was the actor forgetting his line and just said the first thing that came in his mind.
-Oh yeah, Adira and Gray are still in the show.

These three episodes are awful and hilarious. I want more!

[Frustration]

I could watch Star Trek: Discovery, Season 4.

I could also hit myself in the head with the sharp end of a hammer.

[Madner Kami]

I could watch Star Trek: Discovery, Season 4.

I could also hit myself in the head with the sharp end of a hammer.

Great. Seems as if the creators did the same. Worked for them, apparently, as they can still pay their bills?

[BridgeConsoleMasher]

I could watch Star Trek: Discovery, Season 4.

I could also hit myself in the head with the sharp end of a hammer.

Great. Seems as if the creators did the same. Worked for them, apparently, as they can still pay their bills?

7o9 made a strong comeback.

[CharlesPhipps]

Mocking the use of swords in Star Trek more or less confirms you haven't watched any of the show. They're everywhere and if you try to apply practicality to them, then you are showing yourself to have no understanding of the show either.

What's next, mocking aliens who are mostly human?

[Mabus]

At least in SW Jedi and Sith have precog which allow them to evade or deflect long-range weapons fire.
The only thing preventing the Space Nuns from having the same fate as the IJ swordsman is contrived writing.

[Frustration]

Are phasers difficult to acquire or something? They do involve dangerous energy densities, hence their alternate use as grenades. Maybe in the Dark Future no one can manufacture phasers...?

Although a modern industrial society would have to fall pretty far before it lost the ability to manufacture handguns. I take it back.

[clearspira]

Mocking the use of swords in Star Trek more or less confirms you haven't watched any of the show. They're everywhere and if you try to apply practicality to them, then you are showing yourself to have no understanding of the show either.

What's next, mocking aliens who are mostly human?

Swords are stupid in any setting that has guns with the exception of something like Dune that is set up to allow them or Star Wars that relies on superpowers in order to make them semi-viable.

They are there because they are kewl.