1000% this.
That you gave someone money and now regret it is part of life. You sit here on the forum and go on and on about how this affects you. Do you want to guess how often he is thinking about you? Never.
And stop telling others that they are "disingenuous" just because they aren't siding with you. I don't even know if you realize that this thread is probably convincing more people that he was likely totally justified in his actions. Do you think we don't see how you act on this forum? That you can create drama at the drop of a hat from even the friendliest conversation? Do you think any of us are reading this as you being a perfect member of his community only to have done one thing accidentally and someone else blew it way out of proportion? Do you actually believe that was the only reason and that nothing else you had ever done contributed to your exile?
Yuka, I truly and genuinely believe you are a good person at the core. But nobody is required to be your friend or accept you in to their community. You donated money, it is gone. There was no contract, you are not owed a refund nor have much legal standing to force him to review the things you requested (and absolutely zero legal standing to try to stop him from reviewing anything). The regret you feel is yours and yours alone.
The money you gave away is gone, hopefully you will use it as a lesson is economics. The community you were kicked out of is gone, hopefully you will use it as an opportunity to reflect. None of it is coming back. Ever. This is like a breakup, you aren't owed a detailed explanation or that the other person's reasoning stand up to your own scrutiny, they said it is over and so it is. And like a breakup you can choose to allow the experience to poison further relationships, or you can accept what happened and just try to be better in the future. It's not too late to choose the latter.
